I am sure we have all seen this meme floating around social media at some point in the past few years. I know I have seen it shared multiple times on Facebook and the like. When I see it I always ponder it and keep scrolling – it just doesn’t sit right with me. Let’s look a little more deeply into what this is really saying.
Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self esteem, first make sure that you are not, in fact, just surrounding yourself with assholes.
First of all, the original author of this quote is a talented science fiction writer and I in no way want to take away from or put down his writing style.
I see blame in this statement. Externalisation and blame on others for the way that you feel. Now I’m not saying that you are not surrounded by assholes or that this is not the reason you are feeling blue. Nor am I saying that anyone would bring mistreatment on themselves, or ‘deserve’ to be mistreated. What concerns me is the need in our society to blame our negative experiences on others. Conversely, I can also appreciate that this quote will help some to think a little more deeply into their situation and discover that perhaps they don’t deserve to be treated badly.
Life is one big exercise in learning. We are all here with lessons to learn. Not everyone is learning the same lessons, but many of us intertwine and overlap and seemingly clash in order to learn and grow. If we are, in fact, surrounded by assholes then perhaps we need to have a think about why this is. Why do I keep ending up in abusive or co-dependent relationships? Why do I have friends who treat me badly or put me down? Why do colleagues sabotage my work? What do I need to learn from these people!? Maybe it’s a lesson in self worth and the ability to put yourself first and move away from these people, maybe it’s a lesson in self control, maybe it’s a lesson in speaking up and making yourself heard. What I do know is that if you are open to it then the lesson will me made clear. If you are not open to the lesson, which can be very normal as we are only human and, let’s face it, can be overwhelmed by emotions, then the same situation will continue to reappear in your life until the lesson is learned (or we die and start again).
I read a very interesting blog post on lost souls a while ago, which you can find here. I think in our modern world a lot of us have become lost on our path. Life is a confusing thing to be a part of and with our consumer driven society pushing us farther away from our true natural state of being, sometimes it feels easier for a sensitive being who comes from a place of pure energy to simply switch off and become numb (hello, addiction) rather than navigate the minefield of life with an open heart, but the key here is to remember where we came from.
So, are you surrounded by assholes? Good! What is your next step?